Written by Josh, Stylist at Frankie
Turns out being “too much and too gay” was my superpower.
If you had told little Josh that one day he’d make a career out of talking all day, making people feel beautiful, listening to life stories, and somehow convincing strangers to trust him with their hair… he probably would’ve never believed you. If you had told him he’d also be unapologetically gay while doing it? That would’ve taken a lot more convincing.
Growing up gay isn’t exactly a walk through a field of rainbow flowers. It’s more like constantly asking yourself, “Should I tone it down?” Don’t talk with your hands so much. Don’t laugh too loud. Don’t sound too “gay.” Don’t wear that. Don’t be too much.
It’s exhausting trying to edit yourself into someone you think the world will accept.
Spoiler alert: being “less you” is incredibly overrated.
Then I found the hair industry.
Now don’t get me wrong, we’re not perfect. We can be dramatic. We can survive solely on iced coffee and dry shampoo. We somehow know everyone’s life story by 11:30 a.m. But there is something magical about this industry.
Hairdressers don’t just celebrate creativity.
They celebrate individuality.
I’ve met artists who are straight, gay, bi, trans, tattooed, pierced, loud, quiet, introverted, extroverted, covered in pink hair or rocking natural curls. Nobody’s trying to fit into one box.
For the first time in my life, the parts of me I spent years trying to hide suddenly became the things people loved most.
My personality wasn’t “too much.”
It was an asset.
Being loud wasn’t annoying.
It made clients laugh.
Being emotional wasn’t a weakness.
It helped me connect with people.
Being unapologetically gay wasn’t something I needed to explain.
It was simply… me.
And that’s a feeling I wish everyone gets to experience.
Working at Frankie Salon has taken that feeling to another level.
This isn’t just a workplace.
It’s a place where people genuinely cheer each other on.
Where authenticity isn’t just accepted, it’s expected.
Where I never have to wonder if I should shrink myself to make someone else comfortable.
I don’t have to change the way I talk.
I don’t have to change the way I dress.
I don’t have to pretend to be someone else.
I just get to show up.
Exactly as I am.
There’s something incredibly healing about realizing the very things you once prayed would disappear are now the reasons people connect with you.
The laugh you tried to quiet.
The confidence you tried to hide.
The personality you thought was “too much.”
The identity you once questioned.
Those are the things that built your career.
Those are the things your clients remember.
Those are the things that make you… you.
And honestly? That’s pretty iconic.
If you’re someone who’s still figuring out where you belong, whether you’re in this industry or any other, I hope you find your version of what I’ve found.
A place where you don’t have to earn acceptance.
A place where you don’t have to apologize for existing.
A place where your differences aren’t tolerated, they’re celebrated.
Because life is way too short to spend it trying to become someone else’s version of acceptable.
I’ll keep showing up exactly as I am: a little dramatic, a little emotional, probably talking with my hands, definitely making inappropriate jokes at the shampoo bowl, and hopefully making people leave feeling just a little more confident than when they walked in.
And if little Josh could see where he ended up?
He’d probably smile and be so proud of the person he is today!
Happy Pride every month of the year.
Love always,
Your fav gay icon diva… Josh 🩷🫶🏼
If you had told little Josh that one day he’d make a career out of talking all day, making people feel beautiful, listening to life stories, and somehow convincing strangers to trust him with their hair… he probably would’ve never believed you. If you had told him he’d also be unapologetically gay while doing it? That would’ve taken a lot more convincing.
Growing up gay isn’t exactly a walk through a field of rainbow flowers. It’s more like constantly asking yourself, “Should I tone it down?” Don’t talk with your hands so much. Don’t laugh too loud. Don’t sound too “gay.” Don’t wear that. Don’t be too much.
It’s exhausting trying to edit yourself into someone you think the world will accept.
Spoiler alert: being “less you” is incredibly overrated.
Then I found the hair industry.
Now don’t get me wrong, we’re not perfect. We can be dramatic. We can survive solely on iced coffee and dry shampoo. We somehow know everyone’s life story by 11:30 a.m. But there is something magical about this industry.
Hairdressers don’t just celebrate creativity.
They celebrate individuality.
I’ve met artists who are straight, gay, bi, trans, tattooed, pierced, loud, quiet, introverted, extroverted, covered in pink hair or rocking natural curls. Nobody’s trying to fit into one box.
For the first time in my life, the parts of me I spent years trying to hide suddenly became the things people loved most.
My personality wasn’t “too much.”
It was an asset.
Being loud wasn’t annoying.
It made clients laugh.
Being emotional wasn’t a weakness.
It helped me connect with people.
Being unapologetically gay wasn’t something I needed to explain.
It was simply… me.
And that’s a feeling I wish everyone gets to experience.
Working at Frankie Salon has taken that feeling to another level.
This isn’t just a workplace.
It’s a place where people genuinely cheer each other on.
Where authenticity isn’t just accepted, it’s expected.
Where I never have to wonder if I should shrink myself to make someone else comfortable.
I don’t have to change the way I talk.
I don’t have to change the way I dress.
I don’t have to pretend to be someone else.
I just get to show up.
Exactly as I am.
There’s something incredibly healing about realizing the very things you once prayed would disappear are now the reasons people connect with you.
The laugh you tried to quiet.
The confidence you tried to hide.
The personality you thought was “too much.”
The identity you once questioned.
Those are the things that built your career.
Those are the things your clients remember.
Those are the things that make you… you.
And honestly? That’s pretty iconic.
If you’re someone who’s still figuring out where you belong, whether you’re in this industry or any other, I hope you find your version of what I’ve found.
A place where you don’t have to earn acceptance.
A place where you don’t have to apologize for existing.
A place where your differences aren’t tolerated, they’re celebrated.
Because life is way too short to spend it trying to become someone else’s version of acceptable.
I’ll keep showing up exactly as I am: a little dramatic, a little emotional, probably talking with my hands, definitely making inappropriate jokes at the shampoo bowl, and hopefully making people leave feeling just a little more confident than when they walked in.
And if little Josh could see where he ended up?
He’d probably smile and be so proud of the person he is today!
Happy Pride every month of the year.
Love always,
Your fav gay icon diva… Josh 🩷🫶🏼
More Than Just Hair
